Excerpted from “The Christian Soldier” by Thomas Watson

Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test?” 2 Corinthians 13:5.

This is a duty of great importance: it is a parleying with one’s own heart, Psalm 77:6. “I commune with my own heart.”

Self-examination in itself is difficult:

• It is a work of self-reflection; it lies most with the heart. It is hard to look inward. External acts of religion are easy; to lift up the eye to Heaven, to bow the knee, to read a prayer—this requires no more labor than for a Catholic to count over his beads; but to examine a man’s self, to turn in upon his own soul, to take the heart as a watch all in pieces, and see what is defective; this is not easy. Reflective acts are hardest. The eye can see everything but itself. It is easy to spy the faults of others—but hard to find out our own.
• Examination of a man’s self is difficult, because of self-love. As ignorance blinds, so self-love flatters. Every man is ready to think the best of himself. What Solomon says of love to our neighbor is most true of self-love; “it hides a multitude of sins,” Proverbs 10:12. When a man looks upon himself in the looking-glass of self-love, his virtues appear greater than they are, and his sins less. Self-love makes one rather excuse what is amiss, than examine it.

As self- examination is in itself difficult, so it is a work which we are hesitant to perform for these reasons:

• Consciousness of guilt. Sin clamors inwardly, and men are loathe to look into their hearts lest they should find that which should trouble them. It is little pleasure to read the hand writing on the wall of conscience.
• Foolish, presumptuous hopes keep men from it: they fancy their estate to be good, and while they weigh themselves in the balance of presumption, they pass the test. Many take their salvation on trust.  How confident are some of salvation—yet never examine their title to Heaven.
• Men like to rest in the good opinions of others: how vain this is! Alas, one may be gold and pearl in the eye of others—yet God may judge him reprobate silver! Bystanders can but see the outward behavior—but they cannot tell what evil is in the heart. Fair streams may run on the top of a river—but vermin may lay at the bottom.
• Men hesitate to examine themselves, because they do not believe Scripture. The Scripture says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9. The heart is the greatest impostor. It will persuade that a slight tear is repentance; a lazy desire is faith.

In self-examination great advantage will accrue to us: the benefit is great whichever way things turn. If upon examination we find that we have not saving grace—then the mistake is discovered, and the danger can be prevented. If we find that we have saving grace—we may take the comfort of it. How glad was he who had “found the pearl of great price?” He who upon search finds that he has but the least degree of grace, is like one who has found his box of evidences; he is heir to all the promises, and in a state of salvation!

So that we would be successful in our self-examination, let us desire God to help us to find out our hearts, Job 34:32. “That which I see not teach you me.”—Lord, take off the veil; show me my heart; let me not perish through mistake, or go to hell with hope of Heaven. “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.” Psalm 139:23-24.